Welcome to my Journey

These are my personal stories, lessons, and learnings that guided me through my father’s end-of-life journey.

How to be a Patient Advocate

The following is a guest blog written by Beth Cavenaugh, the author of Some Light at the End. Beth is a Certified Hospice and Palliative Care nurse with a rich experience in caring for patients at the end of their life. We are grateful to have her wisdom shared here. 


My friend *Susie had a kidney transplant recently, and when I took her to one of her follow up appointments, I was reminded of how important it is to have the tools to be an advocate for your loved one. I am going to give you some insider tips on how to get the answers you need, how to make the system move a little quicker, and how to get better overall care for your loved one.

My Turn To Take Care

It’s humbling to need help, particularly when the help you need is with things that are so basic...

How to Become a Care Partner

“Who are you?” said the Caterpillar…

Gifts For The Person Who...

Apparently Google thinks I’m searching for the perfect “gift for that person who has...

Fear is at the Heart of Love...

...fear is at the heart of love…

This line from a song has always resonated with me, even before...

A Military Brat and Her Airman Father

Caring for loved ones who are dying is always difficult. When that loved one is a decorated war...

"Chosen Family" Care Partner

Recently I learned that a friend is the power-of-attorney and executor for the mother of her...

Self Care Support for Care Partners

“Self-care”, a term that returns 2,970,000,000 results on Google in just 0.60 seconds, and just...

Rethinking the Words Family, Care, and Partner

2020 has been quite the year.  Yes, this is an overstated understatement.  I am not the first...

Who is a Care Partner?

Previously I’ve written about my own disconnection to the term caregiver.  In addition to that...

Care Partners are Different Than Caregivers

As a child I was taught that “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt...

Hope is Not a Strategy

A few weeks ago, I saw the words Hope Is Not A Strategy written on a wall.  It resonated with...

The Power of a Voice

There are so many incredible tools that not only help us remember what it is we need to do in...

Hearing the Ask for Help

I wasn’t raised to ask for help.  I was raised to identify what I wanted to do and then figure...

Reminders Aren't Grief

This morning I looked out my window into my backyard and I saw the daffodils were finally...

Give Me A Fish

 “Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day.  Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a...

The Starting Line

The other day I was listening to a friend talk about her aging parents.  While neither parent...

The Difference Between Parenting & Caregiving – Guest Blog

The following is a “guest blog” – written with much love and passion by the amazing Rachel of ...

For People and For Pets

Recently my friend had to put her dog to sleep.  Cancer had taken over poor Rosie’s body and...

Shielding Children From Your Grief

When I sat down this morning to read the news my feed included an advice column from...

Nothing Prepares You

There are defining moments whose anniversaries give us, as a society or culture, pause to...

I Was There When Moments

It seems like every other day there is some historic event that conjures memories. Like the...

Your "In-Loving Memory" Reminds Me of My Loss

It used to be that I took note of the name and notation about the life of whomever was...

Understanding the Motivation Behind Decisions

When my Dad was sick one of his biggest fears was to lose the ability to make decisions for...

The Fear of Being Wrong

The fear of being wrong, or not doing something right, can be debilitating.  Especially when...

Share More, Share Deeper

In my previous blog, I ended with the suggestion that through transparency you and your loved...

Transparency

Overwhelm, lack of control, and an unfamiliarity with the subject matter and “language” of...

The Care Team

In her book Eldercare 101, my friend Mary Jo Saavedra encourages families to create an “Aging...

Does It Have a Happy Ending?

People mean well, they really do.  Even thoughtless people and those who can’t relate to your...

Others Are Going Through This with You

So far most of what I’ve written to you about has been focused on the emotional and...

Remain True to Yourself

For a time, a long time, during my Dad’s illness I felt this immense pressure to be his...

Fight or Flight

“Dad had just shared with us his diagnosis. I clearly remember looking around the kitchen...

You Can't Control What is Happening

Until I was faced with the news that my father was dying, I’d not given much thought to the...

If You Care, You Are a Care Partner

It wasn’t until I was on the phone with my Dad’s chosen hospice provider that I realized that I...